How to Receive Feedback Positively

How you receive feedback Determines how successful you become (in career and life). 4 proven tips to help you gracefully accept the gift of feedback: 1/ Listen actively Why: By approaching feedback with curiosity, you show a willingness to listen to understand (vs. to respond) the other person's perspective. How: Maintain eye contact, nod to acknowledge understanding, and wait until the person has finished speaking before responding. Remember, listening doesn't mean you agree with everything. "Thank you for sharing your thoughts on my presentation. I'm curious to learn more. Can you elaborate on the areas you think need improvement and what advice you have on how I can approach these differently?" 2/ Seek diverse perspectives Why: Asking for feedback from different people gives you a clearer picture of what you’re doing well and where you can improve. Plus, it helps you spot patterns in how others see your work. How: After receiving feedback on risk management from one person, reach out to others for additional perspective. "I'm looking to improve the quality of my risk management and reporting within my program. Do you have any advice for me in this area? Your input will help me de-risk execution and provide more accurate representation to stakeholders." 3/ Take time to process and reflect Why: Feedback can sting at first contact. Taking time to process it helps you manage your emotional response and consider it objectively. You can then identify key takeaways and develop a plan for implementing changes. How: "I appreciate your feedback on my communication style. I want to take some time to reflect on your suggestions and consider how to incorporate them into my interactions with the team. Can we schedule a follow-up meeting to discuss my action plan next week?" 4/ Express gratitude and close the loop Why: Expressing gratitude shows that you value the person's time and effort in providing feedback. Following up proves you’re serious about improving. How: "Thank you for sharing your feedback on my project estimations. Your input on factoring dependency review timelines has given me valuable perspective. Attached is the revised proposal based on your suggestions. I welcome any additional feedback you may have." PS: Feedback is not all-or-nothing. Even if you don't agree with everything, there's usually something valuable to take away. PPS: How gracefully you handle feedback directly correlates with whether others will give it to you (again). Image Credit: Roberto Ferraro

Your response to feedback reveals more about your leadership potential than your actual performance. After coaching hundreds of executives through difficult feedback conversations, I've learned that how you receive feedback determines how much you'll receive in the future. The feedback death spiral looks like this: 1) Someone gives you honest input 2) You get defensive or make excuses 3) They decide you're not coachable 4) They stop investing in your development 5) You stop growing What high-potential leaders do differently when receiving feedback: ✅ Stay Curious, Not Defensive Replace: "That's not what I meant" With: "Help me understand what you observed" ✅ Ask Clarifying Questions "Can you give me a specific example?" "What would you recommend I do differently?" "How did that impact you/the team?" ✅ Summarize and Confirm "What I'm hearing is..." "Let me make sure I understand..." "The key takeaway for me is..." ✅ Express Genuine Gratitude • Thank them for their courage to speak up • Even if the delivery wasn't perfect • Even if you disagree with the content Treat feedback like market research about your leadership brand. The person giving it is your customer, telling you about their experience with your "product." You don't have to agree with all feedback, but you should always understand it. The best leaders I coach actively seek feedback because they know their careers depend on what they can't see about themselves. Coaching can help; let's chat. | Follow Joshua Miller #executivecoaching #feedback #leadership #careeradvice #business

Good: → "Thanks for the feedback." Better: → "Thanks for pointing that out. I'll try to do better next time." Best: → "I appreciate you taking the time to provide constructive feedback on my presentation style. I understand your point about pacing & will consciously work on varying my speed in the future." Next level: → "I actively solicit feedback after each presentation. I've found that asking specific questions like, "What was the most impactful part of the presentation?" or "What could have been clearer?" yields the most actionable insights. I then meticulously track & analyze this feedback to identify patterns and areas for consistent improvement." Reality: → "Sometimes, feedback stings. It's easy to get defensive, especially when you're passionate about your work. The reality is, even the harshest feedback often contains a kernel of truth. The key is to separate the message from the delivery, focus on the intent, and identify actionable steps for growth. Remember, feedback is a gift, even when wrapped in prickly paper." Accepting feedback takes practice sometimes. Have you ever felt stung by a constructive feedback? Share your stories before.

When we receive "constructive" feedback, our brain typically goes into fight-or-flight because the feedback threatens our false identity as perfectionists who never make mistakes. It's not just that our WORK PRODUCT is flawed; we feel flawed. We then default into physical, emotional and cognitive contraction -- receiving the information defensively or aggressively. To be effective at receiving feedback, we must be intentional and strategic about what we say and how we act when the feedback is being conveyed -- otherwise our default nervous system reactions will contaminate our thinking and our behavior. This will harm both our learning/growth and our relationship with the feedback giver -- 2 core pillars of excelling professionally. So how do we override our default reactions and instead signal -- to the feedback giver AND to our own brain -- openness, curiosity and a growth mindset? Here are 4 of the practical tips I shared during "The Art & Science of Receiving Feedback" breakouts I led at the Fisher Phillips retreat last week: 💫 NON-VERBALS: override unconscious physical contraction across the top 5 non-verbals: posture (90°+ between spine and pelvis to overcome "bracing"), arms (don’t create a barrier), eyes (un-squint), mouth (unlock jaw and lips), and breath (deepen to diaphragm and lengthen each cycle). 💫 FIRST UTTERANCE: make your first response either gratitude (a sentence of appreciation) OR pause (if you're too emotional to express gratitude, apply Dr. Jill Bolte Taylor's 90-Second Rule) to buy time before speaking. Requesting time to reflect and circling back later that day or next day is highly effective. (We do NOT need to respond substantively in real time, despite our mind’s illusion.) 💫 PARAPHRASE THE FEEDBACK: your first substantive response should NOT be agreement or evaluation; it should summarize it in your own words. This increases comprehension, demonstrates understanding, signals openness, and builds trust (people trust those who understand their views). 💫 ASK 1-2 DEEPENING QUESTIONS: again delaying evaluation, identify 1-2 questions that deepen the discussion beyond what was initially shared by the feedback giver -- demonstrating openness, engagement, and the ability to take the feedback to a deeper or more nuanced level. Then -- AND ONLY THEN -- are you positioned to begin evaluating the validity of the feedback. And yet, as a result of these initial responses, you will have overridden your default reactions, built trust with the feedback giver, cemented your orientation into a growth mindset, and primed your brain to maximally comprehend and evaluate the feedback. Having a simple, science-based road map in those uncomfortable feedback conversations can be a real game-changer. Otherwise, we tend to "shoot from the hip" -- and that is NOT when our highest and best self emerges.... Would love to hear any thoughts, additions, or insights you have on the above!

Not all feedback is valid, but all feedback is valuable because it provides us with insight into perceptions. A key question I often receive is how to receive feedback, especially when you disagree with it. The challenge is that when we get defensive, we create an environment where people are reluctant to share feedback with us, and that is what I find holds leaders back more than anything. Everyone in the office knows something about this person that is holding them back in their career, except for the person. Two reasons: 1. No one told them. 2. They have received feedback and haven’t done anything about it. That’s why teach the ARC model for receiving feedback effectively: 🔹 Acknowledge – Listen without reacting, interrupting, or defending. Thank the person for sharing, even if you’re not sure you agree. 🔹 Reflect – Ask questions to understand: “Can you share an example?”, “What impact did you notice?” “What would effective look like instead?” Curiosity over judgment. 🔹 Commit – Decide what you will do with the feedback. You might commit to a specific change, experiment with it, follow up, ask for support or clarification, and take action. Even if the feedback is based on an incorrect assumption, you still need to consistently adjust how you show up so people's perceptions can shift over time. Leaders who consistently acknowledge, reflect, and commit turn even imperfect feedback into fuel for growth and stronger trust. If you want to receive actionable leadership tips right in your inbox every Wednesday, sign up for my newsletter (link in my bio).

When was the last time you received honest-to-goodness feedback? Did it make your stomach turn a little? Did you immediately want to defend yourself, explain your side, or change the subject? You’re not alone. Feedback can feel uncomfortable, awkward—even threatening—especially when we’re caught off guard. But here’s the truth: feedback is essential if you want to live and lead from the front-row of your life. It’s a key ingredient in personal growth, leadership development, and unlocking your full potential. So instead of dreading it, let’s reframe how we receive feedback. Here are three powerful strategies you can use to make the most of any feedback conversation: 1. Be Curious, Not Defensive You cannot be curious and defensive at the same time. So, the next time someone gives you feedback, take a breath and lean in.  Ask questions like:  “Can you give me a specific example of what you mean?”  “When did you observe that behavior?”  “Can you tell me more?”  Curiosity shifts the energy in the conversation. Instead of shutting down, you open up to understanding. And that’s where real growth begins. 2. Ask for Advice, Not Just Critique Feedback without a vision for improvement can feel like criticism.  Flip the script by asking:  “What would success look like in this situation?”  “What would you suggest I do differently next time?”  “If you were in my shoes, what would you try?”  This invites the other person into a problem-solving mindset and helps you focus on what’s next instead of what went wrong. 3. Say Thank You (Even If It Was Hard to Hear) Gratitude goes a long way—especially when the feedback stings. If someone took the time to offer you constructive insight, thank them. They might have struggled to bring it up, but they did it anyway.  Try this:   “Thank you for being honest with me. I really appreciate it.”   “I wouldn’t have known that if you hadn’t said something. I’ll reflect on this.”  The people who care enough to give us feedback often want to see us succeed. Let them know their input matters. Front-Row Takeaway: Feedback doesn’t have to be a source of fear or friction. When you:  Stay curious,  Seek clarity and advice, and Express gratitude… …you transform feedback from something awkward into something actionable. That’s what front-row leaders do—they face the music, learn the dance, and keep growing. 

Feedback is a gift, even if it stings. Especially when it comes from your boss. And with end-of-year reviews around the corner, timing is everything. What most do when receiving feedback: ↳ Get defensive and shut down ↳ Take it personally, not professionally ↳ Miss the growth opportunity within 7 ways to transform feedback into career gold: 1. Master the first response ↳ Stay calm and collected ↳ Show openness to learn 2. Decode the message ↳ Look beyond the delivery style ↳ Focus on actionable insights 3. Ask smart questions ↳ Seek specific examples ↳ Request clear success metrics 4. Document everything ↳ Write down key points raised ↳ Note suggested improvements 5. Create a visible action plan ↳ Show your boss you're serious ↳ Set clear milestones for change 6. Schedule progress updates ↳ Don't wait for next year's review ↳ Take initiative to show growth 7. Turn criticism into coaching ↳ Ask for resources to improve ↳ Treat your boss as a mentor The best employees don't just hear feedback. They make their boss notice the change. What's your best tip for handling feedback? Let me know in the comments. ♻️ Repost to spread career wisdom 👉 Follow Lauren Murrell for more like this

"You completely missed the mark." Getting constructive feedback can feel like a career crisis. Often followed by the knee-jerk reaction to defend yourself. So, as I prepared to deliver feedback to a great staff member, I was bracing myself. Instead, I got a master class in how to receive constructive criticism. As I shared my thoughts with her, she was nodding, and taking notes. And then she said, "Thank you." Compared to the normal defensive body language and "yes, buts" I was used to, she was a model of grace under pressure. Here are 7 strategies that set her apart: 1️⃣ The Shhh... Rule ❌ Immediate emotional reactions ✅ Say "thank you," and sit on it for now 💡Why? ↳ It gives your emotions time to cool down ↳ Once calm, you can objectively process the info 2️⃣ Take Careful Notes ❌ Relying on memory ✅ Write down what you heard word for word 💡Why? ↳ Shows you're taking it seriously ↳ Helps you spot patterns over time 3️⃣ Ask the Right Question ❌ "Why are you criticizing me?" ✅ "What would you like to see instead?" 💡Why? ↳ Clarifies feedback and creates action items ↳ Shows you're solution-focused 4️⃣The Mirror Technique ❌ Guessing their meaning ✅ Reflect back: "What I'm hearing is..." 💡Why? ↳ Catches misunderstandings early ↳ Shows you're actively listening 5️⃣ The Thoughtful Follow-Up ❌ Avoidance ✅ Schedule a check-in 2-3 weeks later 💡Why? ↳ Demonstrates accountability ↳ Builds trust and strengthens the relationship 6️⃣ The Documentation Log ❌ Treat each feedback session as isolated ✅ Keep a feedback journal 💡Why? ↳ Spot recurring themes ↳ Some bosses say they gave feedback and didn't 7️⃣ The Reframe ❌ Taking feedback as personal attacks ✅ Ask yourself: "If my best friend got this feedback..." 💡Why? ↳ Creates emotional distance ↳ Leads to better solutions Most managers want to give feedback because they want you to do better. They're investing their time in your growth. Do you have a tip for handling tough feedback? Share it in the comments👇 🎉You've got this and I've got you!🎉 ♻️ Share to help people with their professional growth 🔔 Follow Sarah Baker Andrus for more career strategies 📌Want job search support? DM me to chat!

How to Handle Feedback? Feedback—whether constructive or critical—is a gift that helps us grow. But let’s admit it, receiving feedback can sometimes feel overwhelming or even discouraging. How we respond in these moments defines our growth mindset and professional maturity. Here’s my approach: 1️⃣ Pause and Reflect: Instead of reacting impulsively, I take a moment to process the feedback. This helps me separate emotions from facts. 2️⃣ Seek Clarity: If the feedback isn’t clear, I ask specific questions to understand the perspective better. Clarity ensures I address the root issue. 3️⃣ Embrace It as an Opportunity: Even harsh feedback often carries a lesson. I focus on what can be learned rather than dwelling on the negative delivery (if any). 4️⃣ Acknowledge and Plan: Once I’ve understood the feedback, I acknowledge its validity and share a plan for improvement. This demonstrates accountability and a proactive approach. 5️⃣ Follow Up: After implementing changes, I reconnect with the feedback provider to ensure the issue is resolved and build trust. Feedback isn’t the end; it’s a step towards excellence. By accepting it with humility and focusing on solutions, we not only enhance our skills but also strengthen relationships with colleagues and stakeholders. 💡 How do you handle feedback? Comment #FeedbackMatters #GrowthMindset #ProfessionalDevelopment #Leadership #storiesatworkplace

Receiving feedback can be challenging, but how we handle it makes all the difference. Embracing a non-defensive mindset allows us to respond thoughtfully rather than react impulsively. Here’s how: 🔹 𝗣𝗮𝘂𝘀𝗲 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗥𝗲𝗳𝗹𝗲𝗰𝘁: When receiving feedback, take a moment to breathe and process. This pause helps prevent a knee-jerk reaction and allows you to consider the feedback objectively. 🔹 𝗟𝗶𝘀𝘁𝗲𝗻 𝗔𝗰𝘁𝗶𝘃𝗲𝗹𝘆: Focus on truly understanding the feedback being given. Listen without interrupting or formulating a response in your mind. Show that you value the other person’s perspective. 🔹 𝗔𝘀𝗸 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝘀𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀: Clarify any points you’re unsure about. Asking questions demonstrates your commitment to understanding and improving, and it can provide valuable insights into how others perceive your work. 🔹 𝗦𝗲𝗽𝗮𝗿𝗮𝘁𝗲 𝗘𝗺𝗼𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 𝗳𝗿𝗼𝗺 𝗙𝗮𝗰𝘁: It’s natural to feel defensive, but try to distinguish between the emotional impact of the feedback and the factual information it contains. This helps in addressing the constructive aspects of the feedback. 🔹 𝗘𝘅𝗽𝗿𝗲𝘀𝘀 𝗚𝗿𝗮𝘁𝗶𝘁𝘂𝗱𝗲: Thank the person for their feedback. It takes courage to give constructive criticism, and showing appreciation fosters a culture of open communication and mutual respect. 🔹 𝗥𝗲𝗳𝗹𝗲𝗰𝘁 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗔𝗰𝘁: Take time to reflect on the feedback and identify actionable steps for improvement. Use the feedback as a tool for personal and professional growth. Non-defensive responses to feedback are a sign of maturity and a growth mindset. By responding thoughtfully, we can turn feedback into a powerful catalyst for continuous improvement and stronger relationships.  ---------- Hey, I'm Kevin, I am the host of Working Wisdom and The Toxic Leadership Podcast and provide daily posts and insights to help transform organizational culture and leadership. ➡️ Follow for more ♻️ Repost to share with others (or save for later)