Overlooking Emotional Intelligence

The CEO admitted he was terrified. Not in a private conversation. Not in therapy. On stage. In front of his 100 top leaders. During the biggest crisis in company history. A multi-billion dollar energy company being acquired. Decades-old family business dissolving. A board member who'd worked with this CEO for 15 years said after: "I've never felt that level of engagement before." What happened? Your IQ is the racecar. Your EQ is the fuel. This CEO had the car. Brilliant mind. Decades of expertise. The intelligence that builds billion-dollar companies. But for months, his people weren't going anywhere. Because he refused to add the fuel. When you ignore emotions, you don't erase them. You lose control of them. Those leaders were feeling everything: fear, grief, uncertainty. The CEO's refusal to acknowledge it didn't make those emotions disappear. It made them radioactive. Unspoken fear → passive resistance Unacknowledged grief → disengagement Suppressed anxiety → paralysis Before that moment, he told me, "I've processed this. I'm excited. My people know I'm not emotional." His company was being ripped apart, and he wanted to pretend he had it figured out. I pushed back: "Your leaders need you to meet them there." He looked at me like I'd asked him to set his career on fire. But something shifted. When he got on stage, he told them the truth: "Some nights I was terrified." The room went from frozen to electric. That's when the fuel hit the engine. His IQ was still there. But his EQ—his willingness to meet people in their emotional reality—moved 100 paralyzed leaders into action. The World Economic Forum ranks emotional intelligence as a top in-demand skill. TalentSmart found 90% of high performers are highly emotionally intelligent. Most agree, then go back to polishing the car while their team sits stuck. Right now, while you're nodding about EQ, your best people are updating their resumes. Not because you're a bad leader. Because you're performing certainty they don't believe. They know you're anxious about AI, or uncertain about the restructure. Your refusal to admit it teaches them they're alone in their fear. So they're seeking leaders who will meet them there. EQ isn't a soft skill. It's a stability skill. Your ability to read the room matters more than your strategic plan. Your ability to sense when someone's breaking matters more than your documentation. Your ability to build trust through humanity says whether your strategy moves people forward. The leaders who will own the next decade aren't the ones with credentials. They're the ones who sense what's happening while everyone else fakes certainty. Who read the resignation letter that hasn't been written. Who admit their own fear and give others permission to stop pretending. Your emotional intelligence IS your effectiveness. Not your credentials. Your ability to stay human when everything's falling apart. Are you fueling or just polishing the car?

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝘀𝗸𝗶𝗹𝗹 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁'𝘀 𝗺𝗶𝘀𝘀𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗳𝗿𝗼𝗺 𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗿𝘆 𝗾𝘂𝗮𝗹𝗶𝘁𝘆 𝗽𝗿𝗼𝗳𝗲𝘀𝘀𝗶𝗼𝗻𝗮𝗹 𝗷𝗼𝗯 𝗱𝗲𝘀𝗰𝗿𝗶𝗽𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻. Whenever I see a position description for a Quality Professional, it lists the usual suspects: organised, attentive, strong problem-solving and analytical skills with an eye for detail, excellent written and verbal communication skills, strong knowledge of standards and regulations, etc. It all makes sense. These are important capabilities. But there's a skill conspicuously absent from these lists. One that's actually crucial to success in quality leadership. 𝗘𝗺𝗼𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝗮𝗹 𝗶𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗹𝗹𝗶𝗴𝗲𝗻𝗰𝗲. And it matters more than people realise. Quality professionals rarely have direct authority over the people whose behaviour they need to influence. You're asking operators, managers, technicians, to change how they've always done things. You're navigating departmental silos where people see quality controls as additional workload. You're translating regulatory requirements into practical actions for teams who didn't ask for your input. Think about what actually happens in your day-to-day work. You need to sense when someone's resistance is about the process itself versus feeling overwhelmed. You need to read the room during audits and know when to push for clarity versus when to step back. You need to build enough trust that people come to you before problems escalate, not after. Technical knowledge gets you in the door. Emotional intelligence determines whether you can actually get anything done once you're there. And the research confirms this. Daniel Goleman's study of more than 500 organisations found that 85% of senior leaders owe their outstanding performance to emotional intelligence rather than technical skills or IQ. The best quality professionals I've worked with aren't just meticulous, they're perceptive. They understand that a robust QMS works because it's people-centric, not because it's comprehensive. They know how to make compliance feel like collaboration, not imposition. They don't just sit at their desk reviewing documents. They walk around and talk to people, building rapport and gaining trust. If you're struggling to gain traction in your quality role despite having all the technical credentials, this might be the missing piece. It's not that your processes are wrong; it's that the human system around them isn't ready to receive them. And that's a different kind of problem requiring a different kind of skill. 𝗪𝗵𝗮𝘁'𝘀 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗲𝘅𝗽𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗲𝗻𝗰𝗲? P.S. I'm going to be exploring this and the human side of system building in my newsletter over the coming weeks. Link in the comment if you want to get it when it drops. #humancentredsystem #qualitymanagementsystem #qualitymanagement #qualityplusscience #

A few weeks ago, I was working with a high-performing business owner who had everything on paper—strategy, skills, and a solid business plan. But every time he stepped into a leadership role, he hit a wall. His team wasn't engaged, sales conversions were inconsistent, and he constantly felt drained. After one deep coaching session, we uncovered the missing piece: emotional intelligence (EQ). He was making decisions based on fear rather than his vision. His conversations were reactive instead of intentional. And because he didn’t understand how his emotions influenced his leadership, he couldn’t fully connect with his team, clients, or even himself. The moment he started practicing self-alignment, emotional regulation, and strategic communication, everything shifted. His business took off, his team became more aligned, and he stepped into the confident, respected leader he was meant to be. So, what makes emotional intelligence the X-factor in business? ✔️ Self-Alignment – If you don’t understand your own triggers, patterns, and emotional responses, how can you lead others effectively? High-EQ leaders check in with themselves before they react, ensuring they operate from a place of strength, not stress. ✔️ Empathy – The best business owners don’t just close deals; they build relationships. Empathy allows you to step into your client’s or team member’s perspective, creating trust and loyalty that leads to long-term success. ✔️ Emotional Regulation – Challenges and setbacks are inevitable. But emotional intelligence allows you to navigate them without getting derailed. Instead of reacting impulsively, EQ-driven leaders respond with strategy and composure, staying laser-focused on their vision and plan of action. ✔️ Influential Communication – Business isn’t just about what you say—it’s about how you say it and being able to listen intentionallly. Leaders with high EQ know how to read the room, adapt their message, and create genuine connections that drive results. In today’s fast-paced business world, intelligence and strategy alone aren’t enough. The leaders and entrepreneurs who rise to the top are the ones who master the art of emotional intelligence and then implement a strategic plan of action. Where do you see emotional intelligence playing the biggest role in your business? If you are ready to take your business to the next level, let's have a conversation.

Leaders who claim they "don't do emotions" at work? That's the biggest myth of leadership. Truly effective leadership stems from emotional intelligence, not an inability to feel. It's time to unpack and dismantle this persistent myth about great leaders needing to be emotionally unaffected: •Emotions drive human motivation, decision-making, and behavior - things leaders need to understand. •Suppressing emotions creates disconnection and mistrust among teams. •Leaders must have self-awareness to regulate their own emotions appropriately. •Emotional intelligence allows leaders to empathize, inspire, and connect with others. •The most respected leaders use emotions to create shared meaning and purpose. •Vulnerabilities, when expressed properly, can humanize leaders and build trust. •Emotional agility helps leaders stay resilient and adapt to ever-changing environments. •Emotionally intelligent leaders create psychologically safe cultures for top performance. •Leading with emotional forcefulness, not emotional vacancy, motivates people. True leadership mastery involves striking the right emotional chords. Tune out the myth of the unaffected leader. What experiences have shown you the power of emotionally intelligent leadership? Share your insights below!

Many leaders – especially men — pride themselves on never feeling too good or too bad – or not feeling much at all. They see this as a superpower. In fact, it’s a way of going numb to avoid pain. Suppressing our emotions doesn't make them disappear. Ultimately, it builds the pressure to let them out. When they finally break through, they’re magnitudes more intense. If you never allow yourself to feel sadness or fear, you can never feel joy, or true courage. It’s when you can open your heart – and keep it open – that you become a bigger human human being and a better leader. True emotional intelligence is the capacity to experience the full range of your emotions – for better and for worse – without feeling overwhelmed by them. It's an inside job.

𝐖𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝟕𝟎% 𝐨𝐟 𝐂𝐄𝐎𝐬 𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐀𝐈 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐞𝐜𝐡 𝐬𝐤𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐬 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐧𝐞𝐱𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐞𝐞 𝐲𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐬, 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐪𝐮𝐢𝐞𝐭 𝐫𝐢𝐬𝐤 𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐇𝐮𝐦𝐚𝐧 𝐋𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐩 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐠𝐭𝐡𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐥𝐞𝐟𝐭 𝐛𝐞𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐝 ! 🤖 Welcome AI & Tech Skills… Farewell Emotional Intelligence for CEOs? In today’s boardrooms, the balance is shifting fast. 🧠 Emotional intelligence among CEOs sits at just 38%. The ability to drive employee engagement? Even lower — 20%. At the same time… ⚠️ 63% of leaders say their organisation’s risk exposure has jumped in the past 12 months. 💡 AI is reshaping entire business models faster than leaders can adapt. 🚩 But here’s the critical mistake: Instead of doubling down on irreplaceable human strengths — creativity, trust, and relationships — some leaders are training people for tasks machines will soon take over. 🌍 Geopolitical conflicts are turning trusted supply chains into vulnerabilities overnight. 📉 Talent and skills gaps are widening just when organisations need new capabilities most; according to a new fascinating research published by Korn Ferry using data from a survey of 250 chief executives and board directors worldwide. 🌟 Finally, researchers’ advice to today’s leaders: ✔️ 𝐁𝐮𝐢𝐥𝐝 𝐛𝐨𝐭𝐡 𝐭𝐞𝐜𝐡 𝐟𝐥𝐮𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐲 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐡𝐮𝐦𝐚𝐧 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 ✔️ 𝐌𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐞𝐦𝐩𝐚𝐭𝐡𝐲 𝐦𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞 ✔️ 𝐏𝐫𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐜𝐭 𝐬𝐩𝐚𝐜𝐞 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐮𝐚𝐥 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 ✔️ 𝐑𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐦𝐛𝐞𝐫 𝐝𝐢𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐩𝐞𝐨𝐩𝐥𝐞 𝐧𝐞𝐞𝐝 𝐝𝐢𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐝𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐥𝐨𝐩𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭 ✅ 𝙈𝙮 𝙥𝙚𝙧𝙨𝙤𝙣𝙖𝙡 𝙫𝙞𝙚𝙬:  I’m not surprised that so much of today’s advertising — especially from BIG consulting firms — pushes CEOs and executives to believe their top priority should be AI and technical skills above all else. I agree with the researchers’ point of view: if leaders follow this belief blindly, they risk putting their organisations and their businesses in a vulnerable position in the coming years. The truth is far more nuanced. Yes, AI fluency is essential. But so is the ability to lead with empathy, build trust, inspire creativity, and strengthen relationships. Both skill sets are critical — and neglecting the human side of leadership can quietly erode even the most advanced technical capabilities. In the age of AI, the leaders who will thrive are those who can master the technology and the timeless human skills that no machine can replace. 🙏Thank you Korn Ferry researchers team for sharing these insightful findings: Tierney Remick Alan Guarino Jane Edison Stevenson Lucy McGee Dominic Schofield 🔑 What’s one human capability you believe will become more valuable, not less, in the age of AI? #Leadership #HumanSkills #EmotionalIntelligence #ExecutiveLeadership

Throughout my career, I’ve had the privilege of working with many leaders who took genuine pride in being empathetic, good listeners, and self-aware. These were their superpowers, and honestly, I admired them for it. But somewhere along the way, these leaders had to face an uncomfortable truth, some of what they assumed emotional intelligence was actually emotional performance. They weren’t always empathizing. Sometimes they were rescuing, stepping in to fix problems because it made them feel needed, not because it was what the other person actually needed. They weren’t always listening. Sometimes they were waiting, nodding along while quietly steering the conversation back toward their own perspective. They weren’t always being self-aware. Sometimes they were seeking reassurance, hoping the feedback they received would confirm they were doing just fine. The hardest part? They meant well. Every single time. That’s the nature of performative emotional intelligence. It doesn’t come from bad people. It comes from good people with unexamined needs, the need to be the hero, to be right, to be liked. Real emotional intelligence isn’t a set of skills you perform in the moment. It begins much earlier, in the quiet, uncomfortable work of honestly examining what’s driving you beneath the surface. So here’s the question every leader must reflect on, is your emotional intelligence self-serving, or authentic?

Emotional intelligence is uniquely human, right? Nope... New research at the University of Bern found six leading AI models, including ChatGPT-4, outperformed humans on standardized emotional intelligence tests. It wasn't even close - AI averaged 81% versus humans' 56%. But here's the important part for every business leader: AI doesn't just score higher on tests. It can spot empathy failures that seasoned executives completely missed. The Royal Caribbean Reality Check: Last year, I fed the cruise line's tone-deaf communication about rerouting a luxury ship mid-voyage for a marketing photoshoot to Claude AI. It immediately flagged multiple empathy failures that company executives had missed: - Impersonal tone that ignored passenger stress - Tone-deaf request for guests to "celebrate" the disruption - Complete absence of any apology The AI then predicted guest reactions with startling accuracy. Forum comments proved it right: "Shocking," "Absurd," "Lost their minds," "Clinches my decision to go elsewhere." This isn't about AI replacing human judgment. It's about a cognitive bias blind spot that affects all leaders under pressure. We get tunnel vision on business objectives and lose sight of stakeholder emotions. Groupthink sets in. People don't want to disagree with the boss. The 81% to 56% performance gap reveals something profound: we're often not as emotionally intelligent as we think we are, especially when focused on internal goals or operating within groupthink dynamics. My advice: Every major business decision and customer communication should now include an AI empathy audit: - Pre-launch communication reviews - Crisis response drafting - Stakeholder impact analysis - Customer journey emotion mapping Companies using AI to enhance—not replace—their emotional intelligence will build stronger relationships. Those ignoring AI's emotional capabilities will keep making avoidable empathy failures. Want to win? Combine BOTH human judgment and AI advice. Have you seen companies surprised when customers reacted poorly to an action or communication that lacked empathy or didn't account for emotion? #EmotionalIntelligence #ArtificialIntelligence #Leadership #CustomerExperience

My 2 Cents… If you’re a nurse without emotional intelligence, you’re not just tired—you’re misaligned We’re not just performing tasks—we’re holding space. Navigating trauma. Managing conflict. Leading through uncertainty. And doing it all while carrying the emotional weight of others. If you’re not in alignment with your values or grounded in emotional intelligence, you’re at risk—of burnout, compassion fatigue, poor communication, and fractured team dynamics. The truth? You can’t create a healthy work culture if your emotional foundation is cracked. You can’t deliver transformational care if you’re disconnected from yourself. Emotional intelligence allows nurses to: ✔️Advocate without aggression ✔️Set boundaries without guilt ✔️Communicate with clarity and compassion ✔️Lead with presence and authenticity It’s not just about how we care for others— It’s how we honor ourselves in the process. Let’s stop treating emotional intelligence like an elective. It’s the core curriculum of nursing leadership, retention, and well-being.

We’ve come up with a new tagline for me: "Culture, leadership, and emotional intelligence from a math guy." With degrees in mathematics and computer science, I understand why technical leaders initially roll their eyes at emotional intelligence. I once dismissed it as "soft and squishy" myself. So how do I overcome this resistance when introducing emotional intelligence to skeptical technical audiences? After working with NASA scientists, surgeons, and military leaders, I've developed an approach that consistently breaks through: 1. Start with data and research. → Technical minds respond to evidence. I begin with research demonstrating the impact of culture and emotional intelligence on performance, engagement, and outcomes. 2. Explain the brain science. → When we're triggered emotionally, we lose cognition and working memory. Taking the time to show this to technical leaders lets them see EQ isn't opposing IQ – it enables it. 3. Make it applicable to their challenges → Show people exactly how these concepts address problems they're struggling with. When they see the relevance to their work, resistance drops dramatically. The reality? It's not EQ *OR* IQ. It's EQ + IQ. Managing emotions (yours and others) allows you to more effectively apply your technical abilities. I've been doing this for 24 years, and I've never encountered an audience where these principles didn't resonate once framed properly.