Calm

I'm always amazed by flight attendants. While I am an avid flyer, turbulence can still be quite unnerving. No matter how much the plane shakes, the light flickers, and people tumble in the aisles you can simply make eye contact with the flight attendant to find calm. Teetering in the aisles with smiles plastered on their faces they reassure you that everything is going to be ok. How often do we do the same for our customers?

calm /kä(l)m/

Not showing or feeling nervousness, anger, or other strong emotions.

Most people who know me, know that I have a sweet yet very naughty beagle named Abby. Abby is very sweet to people and children alike, but she channels her inner Cujo when she sees another dog. No matter where you are physically located I'm pretty sure you can hear my dog barking right now. I sought the help of a dog trainer to see if I could get her to CALM DOWN. I am very embarrassed to report that the issue is not with the dog but with ME! The trainer watched us interact as we walked and noticed that I tensed up as a dog approached, tightening the leash, and my own posture. Apparently dogs can read all that and interpret it as needing to protect me. In order for my dog to find calm, I needed to find calm myself.

The same can be said for working with our teams and customers. In every relationship there are going to be times of stress. A tight timeline, a challenging deliverable, tense negotiations, the list goes on. I typically see these scenarios work in two different manners:

• Option 1: Emotions running high. The customer calls upset about a situation. The person receiving the call becomes tense worried about the possible ramification. The emotions of both parties actually prevent a solution from being found.
• Option 2: Emotions running high. The customer calls upset about a situation. The person receiving the call has empathy (remember we talked about that) and takes a deep breath. They approach the situation with calm and understanding. Suddenly the customer begins to calm as well feeling as if the situation has been seen and solved for before and has confidence it will again. The tone then shift to problem solving based on mutual trust and understanding.

There are so many other stories. Think of when a child hurts skins their knee and the parent could freak out (and in turn the child freaks out more) or act like it's no big deal and soon the child will be calm too. Calm is contagious. Spread it around.

Can you think of a situation in which part of your solution was simply being calm?