Developing Patience in Sales Interactions

Lately, I have been thinking about the balance of patience and urgency in Sales. Here's what 20+ years of studying great sales people has taught me - the old "spray and pray" or “show up and throw up” mentality needs to go. High volume, high intensity, the pitch slap. Enterprise sales isn't about how many prospects you can contact or how fast you can transmit your value proposition. It's about mastering the art of the pause. Think about it: When a customer sends a complex email, your instinct is to fire back immediately. Instead, take a beat. Process. Reflect. Your thoughtful response will be worth the wait. For years I have been guilty of “ready, fire, aim”, only to find myself backpedaling and redoing my response. In the end, I spent MORE time (and wasted more of the prospect’s time) than I would have had I just taken a minute to think my response through twice before hitting send. During presentations, embrace those moments of silence. Research shows people need 8-10 seconds to formulate a perspective on what has been said (source: Gong). Yet most salespeople rush to fill a 2-3 second pause. Those "slow" deals that take quarters or even years to close? That's not a bug, it's a feature. Your prospects are wrestling with significant changes and legitimate fears about failure. The most successful enterprise sellers I've watched over the years understand this fundamental truth: Patience doesn't mean passivity. It means being strategically deliberate in your actions, communications, and relationship-building. Remember, your prospect's decision timeline rarely matches your quota timeline. And that's okay. Because when you master the art of patience, you're not just closing a deal - you're building the foundation for a long-term partnership. ... and long term partnerships create long-term revenue.

Years ago, I watched one of the best enterprise salespeople I've ever known lose a million-dollar deal simply because "𝗜 𝗱𝗼𝗻'𝘁 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝘁 𝘁𝗼 𝗯𝗲 𝗽𝘂𝘀𝗵𝘆". This brilliant, capable professional was letting million-dollar opportunities slip away because she was afraid of seeming aggressive. Sound familiar? Here's the reality I've found after analyzing thousands of sales interactions: The average B2B purchase requires 8+ touches before a response, but most salespeople give up after 2-3. 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝘀𝗼𝗹𝘂𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 𝗶𝘀𝗻'𝘁 𝗳𝗲𝘄𝗲𝗿 𝗳𝗼𝗹𝗹𝗼𝘄-𝘂𝗽𝘀—𝗶𝘁'𝘀 𝗯𝗲𝘁𝘁𝗲𝗿 𝗼𝗻𝗲𝘀. Working with clients across industries, I've developed what some have called the "Goldilocks Sequence" – not too aggressive, not too passive, but just right for maximizing response rates without alienating prospects. It starts with how we view follow-ups. Stop thinking of them as "checking in" and start seeing them as opportunities to deliver additional value. For each client, we build what I call a "Follow-Up Content Library" with 5-10 genuinely valuable resources for each buyer persona – a mix of their content and third-party research addressing likely challenges. Having this ready means follow-ups can pull the most relevant resource based on the specific situation. The sequence itself has a rhythm designed to respect the prospect's time while staying on their radar: 𝗗𝗮𝘆 𝟭 is the initial value-focused outreach with a specific insight (never generic "I'd like to connect" language). Around 𝗗𝗮𝘆 𝟯, we send a gentle bump, forwarding the original email with: "I wanted to make sure this reached you. Any thoughts on the [specific insight]?" It's brief and assumes positive intent. By 𝗗𝗮𝘆 𝟱, we shift to an alternative channel like LinkedIn, with a personalized note referencing the insight, but still no meeting request. Around 𝗗𝗮𝘆 𝟴 comes the pure value-add – sharing a relevant resource with no ask attached: "Came across this [article/case study] that addresses the [challenge] we discussed. Thought you might find it valuable regardless of our conversation." 𝗗𝗮𝘆 𝟭𝟮 brings what I call the "pattern interrupt" – a brief email with an unexpected subject line and single-question format that's easy to respond to. Then, around Day 18, we send the "permission to close" message: "I'm sensing this might not be a priority right now. If that's the case, could you let me know if I should check back in the future? Happy to remove you from my follow-up list otherwise." This sequence generated a 34% response rate for an enterprise software client compared to their previous 11% using traditional methods. The key difference? Every touch adds legitimate value rather than just asking for time. And because it's systematic, it removes the emotional weight of deciding when and how to follow up. What's your most effective follow-up technique? I'm always collecting new approaches to share with clients. #SalesFollowUp #OutreachStrategy #PipelineGeneration

**The Sales Process: A Marathon, Not a Sprint** In the fast-paced world of sales, it's easy to get caught up in the rush for quick wins and immediate results. But let's take a step back and consider the bigger picture. The sales process is not a sprint; it's a marathon. 🏃♂️ **Endurance Over Speed** Just like in a marathon, endurance and consistency are key. Building relationships, understanding client needs, and crafting tailored solutions take time. It's about pacing yourself, maintaining a steady approach, and being prepared for the long haul. 🤝 **Building Trust** Trust isn't built overnight. It requires multiple touchpoints, genuine interactions, and delivering on promises. Each conversation, follow-up, and meeting is a step forward in establishing a strong foundation of trust with your prospects. 🔍 **Deep Understanding** Rushing through the sales process often leads to missed opportunities and misunderstandings. Take the time to deeply understand your client's challenges, goals, and pain points. This thorough understanding allows you to offer solutions that truly meet their needs, setting you apart from competitors who may only be looking for a quick sale. 📈 **Long-Term Success** Focusing on short-term gains might give you a temporary boost, but it's the long-term relationships and recurring business that drive sustainable success. A marathon mindset encourages nurturing leads, continuous learning, and adapting to evolving market dynamics. 💡 **Patience Pays Off** Patience is a virtue in sales. It allows you to stay calm under pressure, think strategically, and make decisions that benefit both you and your clients in the long run. Remember, it's about creating value over time, not just hitting immediate targets. Embrace the marathon mindset in your sales process. Pace yourself, focus on building lasting relationships, and stay committed to understanding and serving your clients. The journey might be longer, but the rewards will be worth it. #SalesStrategy #MarathonNotSprint #SalesProcess #RelationshipBuilding #LongTermSuccess #CustomerFirst

I was young. Naive. Hungry to prove myself. I walked into my boss’s office one day, frustrated with a prospect who had ghosted us after weeks of back-and-forth. I vented. Ranted. Frustrated! My boss let me finish, then calmly said something I’ll never forget: “Everyone is fighting a battle you can’t see. It’s not about you.” I’ll be honest. It hit me hard. I thought about my family. The things we’ve quietly endured. Illness. Loss. Immigration. Late nights and early mornings. And still, we showed up. Smiling. Delivering. And now, here I was, forgetting that on the other side of the phone, that prospect might be dealing with things I’ll never know. So what’s the science behind that phrase? Psychologists call it the fundamental attribution error. We tend to attribute other people’s behavior to who they are, not what they’re going through. But when it comes to ourselves? We give grace. We know our context. We say, “It’s been a rough day.” Empathy isn’t just a “soft” skill, it’s a corrective lens. It helps us see people more clearly. In sales, this mindset is everything. If a prospect is short with you, or unresponsive, or seems distracted, it might not be a lack of interest. It might be life. When we lead with curiosity instead of judgment, we open doors. * We build trust. * We humanize the process. * We sell like people, not robots. So the next time someone throws you off in a call or an email, pause. Ask yourself: “What battle might they be fighting today?” You might not know the answer, but the question alone will humanize the process! 📸This photo taken during a quiet moment on my travels reminded me of that lesson. We rarely see the full path someone’s walking. Just the light they’re stepping into. #Sales #Empathy #Mindset

For the love of God… be...patient... A few years ago, I was on a call with a buyer who casually mentioned a challenge they were facing. Before they could even finish their sentence, I pounced. 🚨 “Oh, yeah - we see that all the time! Let’s jump in and take a look...” 🚨 I launched straight into our product, rattling off features like I was reading a teleprompter. I thought I was crushing it. And then? Silence. The buyer gave me a polite nod, said they’d “think about it,” and never called back. I had just committed the #1 sin in sales: solving too soon. It's the the sales equivalent of a fire extinguisher Most sales reps are like overeager camp counselors. They see a spark - a problem the buyer mentions - and instead of letting the fire build, they grab the extinguisher and put it out immediately. 🔥 Buyer: “Yeah, we’ve been struggling with forecasting accuracy.” 🚒 Sales rep: “Oh! We have an AI-powered forecasting engine that...” STOP. Let the fire spread. Because if the problem doesn’t feel big enough, the solution won’t feel necessary. So what do you do instead? → Here's my “Let It Burn” Framework: Next time a buyer mentions a problem, resist the urge to solve it. Instead, dig deeper. Ask pain-amplifying questions like: ✅ “How long has this been an issue?” (Time pressure) ✅ “What have you tried already?” (Exposing failed attempts) ✅ “What’s this impacting right now?” (Connecting it to real pain) ✅ “What happens if this doesn’t get fixed?” (Creating urgency) Make them sit in the problem. Make them feel it. Because no pain = no urgency. No urgency = no deal. Most deals aren’t lost because your solution isn’t good. They’re lost because the problem never felt urgent enough to fix. So next time you hear a buyer mention a challenge? Shut up. Then dig deeper. The bigger the problem feels, the easier the close.

“Music is the space between the notes.” – Claude Debussy This quote reminds me of some of the best sales advice I ever got.... Don’t be in such a hurry to talk about your stuff. Everyone in the meeting knows we're there to talk about our stuff. We all know we're going to get there. In the sales call recordings I review, too often salespeople will jump the gun. They pounce at the first opening they see. Customer mentions a problem - BOOM - we leap in with our solution. Or, early in the meeting the customer ask a direct question about capabilities, we take the bait, and start talking about our experience. That can leave us on our heels the entire meeting getting peppered with questions and quickly eliminating ourselves by saying too much too soon. Here’s the thing: patience is a competitive advantage. Rushing shows insecurity. Holding back shows confidence. When we create space, we also create trust. People feel seen, not sold. There is nothing wrong with weaving in your expertise and credibility into the conversation. Recent research from Gong still shows the average salesperson still talks 60% of the time during meetings, proving that listening is more the exception not the rule. Yet it also shares that more questions don't always lead to better results. But one thing for sure - if you start selling too soon, it's hard to get back into question mode. Some approaches to try if you find yourself talking too much:  👉 Mute - when online, literally hit the mute button after you ask a question. It shows the other person you're listening and manually shuts you up. 👉 The Pregnant Pause - wait two seconds to reply after someone finishes talking. Often times, you'll find your prospect will jump in to fill the silence before you do. 👉 T.E.D. - Use phrases like, “Tell me more… Could you Explain a bit… Describe how…” These can work better than standard who/what/where/why questions that can feel more like an interrogation and not a conversation. 👉 Breathe - Take a few nice deep breaths before you hop into your meeting. Calm your nervous system and prepare yourself to be calm and present. And that’s where the music comes in - the space between the notes. A conversation, like a song, only works if there’s rhythm and rest. The silence is what gives the sound its meaning. Sales happens in that space – in the quiet where they reveal what’s really on their mind. On your next sales call - create space, don't just fill it. 🤘

Visibility creates luck. Consistency creates timing. And here’s the part most sellers learn the hard way: Clients don’t buy your service. They buy the version of themselves that exists after working with you. Sales taught me patience in ways no meditation app ever could. 🤝 Not the “be calm” kind. The “stay steady when nothing moves” kind. Here are 7 small ways I practice patience as a seller: 1.When a buyer says “send details,” I don’t panic-send a deck. I ask one clarifying question first. 2.When I get ghosted after a great call, I don’t double-text. I wait 24 hours, then follow up with one new insight. 3.When someone pushes the meeting, I don’t guilt-trip. I make rescheduling frictionless and keep the tone warm. 4.When I’m tempted to pitch in the first message, I share something useful instead—something they can forward internally. 5.When I don’t have the perfect “script,” I stop chasing words and start chasing context: what are they solving right now? 6.When a lead comes from an unexpected place (yes, even AI search), I don’t get arrogant. I get curious: why did we show up? 7.When the quarter gets loud, I slow down. Activity stays. Anxiety goes. Patience isn’t passive. It’s strategic. In a world rushing to automate, the seller who can stay human—wins. What’s your most “patient” sales habit that quietly improves outcomes? 👇

Mandy first reached out to a prospect six months ago. Her email was friendly and clear, but they didn’t respond. She followed up a week later. Still no reply. Every month, she sent a quick, thoughtful email— sharing a useful article, asking a simple question. Nothing pushy. Just staying on their radar. Finally, after five months, they replied: “We’re not ready to make changes right now, but let’s keep in touch.” Mandy wanted to push for a meeting. She felt like she’d already waited long enough. But she decided to play it cool. Instead, she wrote back: “Okay.” Another month passed. She stayed top of mind by sharing information about topics the prospect was interested in. Some of it was videos where she answered common questions customers often asked. Then, out of the blue, they emailed her. They wanted to chat. A week later, the deal was signed. Mandy reflected on the journey. She realized: Sales is slow at first and fast at the end. Patience is also part of selling.

Selling in Southeast Asia requires patience.   Unfortunately, ‘patience’ doesn’t exist in sales.   Because in sales... It's always about hunting, results, successes and wins. It's supposed to be ‘dynamic’ so there’s no room for waiting. And certainly, there’s no room for patience.  That’s understandable. But in my books, it is flawed. Because patience is part of my formula that allowed me to close over 100 brands in SEA. ==================== Here’s my 3-step formula: Hard Work + Above and Beyond + Patience = Likeability Wait a minute…. Likeability??? Yup and if you’re looking for a formula for a guaranteed win - I’m not the guy you should follow. Step 1: Hard Work Hard Work refers to your end-to-end sales process: Prospecting > Building Pipeline > Discovery > Solution > Closing > Post Sales Work Hard on this every single day.  Show up and max the reps daily for every qualified lead. Step 2: Above and Beyond Above and Beyond refers to things you do that will make you stand out. There’s a simple rule of thumb for this - be sincere.  Once you know you are sincere, here’s how you execute step 2: 🎥 Send a quick thank-you note/video No one expects it, but everyone appreciates it. 🧠 Pick up on the details Did they mention a conference? Birthday? Send a note or small gift. They’ll never forget. 🔎 Give them insights they didn’t ask for Go beyond your pitch. Share something they didn’t see coming—an industry report, a trend, a tip. 🌐 Make an introduction Connect them to someone in your network that’ll help them. You’re now a problem solver, not a salesperson. ☕ Invite them for a virtual coffee No agenda, no pressure. Just building relationships. Works wonders. 📚 Gift a book or resource Not another sales doc. Something personal and valuable to them. 🎉 Celebrate their wins Did they land a big deal? Get some good press? A quick “Congrats!” goes a long way. ✍️ Handwritten notes still matter In a sea of digital noise, a simple card saying “Thanks” stands out. 🤝 Offer free advice No strings attached. Help them solve a problem before they even become a customer. And most importantly... 🕒 Respect their timeline The hardest one, right? No rush, no pressure. Just confidence that they’ll come back to you when they’re ready. Step 3: Patience Take #10 Respect their timeline and spread it across the process. Don’t rush them. Follow up creatively and stop being paranoid. And that's how you become likeable 🙂 ==================== Hey, you’ve worked hard to build a pipeline in step 1.  So things will happen.   If you noticed, going above and beyond carries a huge weight in this formula.   That’s because people buy from people. We're Asians - selling to other Asians - in Asia... And despite the cutting-edge tech that supports our sales processes, be human. You may lose the deal. But you’d have gained a friend. And friends come back to you when things don’t work out 😉 Stop Selling Start Building ✌ (📌 Pro Tip in comments)

Every sales team complains about bad leads. But here’s the reality: Most leads aren’t bad…they’re just not ready. The problem? Most sales teams have the patience of a toddler. If a lead isn’t raising their hand for a demo, they get ignored. Or worse, they get bombarded with half-baked drip campaigns that scream “Look at our latest blog!” The best teams? They play the long game. - Not all leads deserve a call. A whitepaper download isn’t a buying signal…it’s curiosity. Sales teams that treat curiosity like intent waste time and burn goodwill. - Nurture sequences shouldn’t feel like spam. If your follow-ups look like automated garbage, don’t be shocked when your prospects disappear. Good nurture = insightful, helpful, non-intrusive. - High-touch, low-pressure wins. One team I know has an SDR dedicated to high-potential, low-intent accounts. Instead of pushing meetings, they check in periodically with actual insights. When those accounts are ready? They go straight to them. If you’re complaining about “bad leads,” you don’t have a lead problem - you have a qualification and patience problem. The best teams don’t just chase leads. They play chess with them.