Calling a Truce
Most people thought the Great War that began in July 1914 would be over by Christmas. Instead, the fighting leading up to that December had ended up at a standstill. Both sides reinforced their positions by digging trenches along the Western Front to live and fight and die.
The trenches would extend for at least 25,000 miles if laid end to end. The trenches were as close as 35 yards, a third of a football field at some spots.
There was severe frost on the morning of December 24th, 1914, in France. The trenches were cold and muddy. By noon most shootings and shelling had oddly ceased. Letters home from both sides reported a "strange atmosphere" that developed. One side noticed coloured lantern light becoming brighter in the other trenches as dusk arrived.
In one section, as the cold night descended, a German Officer, Walter Kirchhoff, a tenor in the Berlin Opera before the war, began to sing Silent Night. The beautiful sound was striking against the devastation and darkness all around. Soon both sides joined in, inducing a sense of all things being calmer and a little brighter. Each side took up singing Christmas carols and shared words of encouragement, further brightening the atmosphere.
On Christmas day, Sergeant Fredrick Brown was the first to step out of the trenches unarmed and walk into "no man's land." Brown and others' initial apprehension gave way to a sense of shared humanity and peace that saw about 100,000 soldiers from both sides rise from their trenches in various sections and join together in the temporary ceasefire.
A German and British soldier gladly traded buttons as souvenirs. A British barber trimmed the hair of a German soldier. A German and British soldier hustled off to a farmhouse to find some wine to add to the festivities. A soccer ball appeared from the British side, and soon a friendly game ensued with no referee required. There were burial ceremonies and prisoner swaps. And the soldiers exchanged gifts of chocolate and tobacco. And soldiers wrote home describing the unbelievable truce and shared celebration of Christmas that had occurred.
Years ago, I went through a very challenging period as a Branch Manager. It felt like the office of salespeople were mostly bullies and bandits. During that period, on the way to work, I would quietly recite the Lord's Prayer as the only comfort I could find that would keep me safe in what felt like a war zone. Then, upon arriving, I would go to my office and dig in, and leaving to walk around the floor felt as risky as sticking my head up over a parapet.
Sometimes I would worry about something upcoming and think it would be difficult or go wrong or be met with a challenge when there was almost nothing close to the imagined negative outcome: preparing for a battle when none existed.
"I've had a lot of worries in my life, most of which never happened." Mark Twain
Self-sabotage is little and big mental skirmishes that keep us from moving to our goals and aspirations faster.
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Negativity bias is a natural condition that makes negative experiences more potent and "sticky" than positive experiences.
Catastrophization is a cognitive distortion where we jump to the worst possible conclusion without all the facts. We make stuff up that snowballs into an assumed crisis or conflict.
Sometimes we might even be self-critical that we're self-critical.
We must be vigilant about the mental saboteurs and adversaries that can raid and rob our birthright of health and happiness through their covert actions. So, if you see an opponent when you look in the mirror, consider calling a truce for the holidays.
Here are some tips for the truce:
And when the truce ends, try reframing the "battle" if indeed it feels like that sometimes, to a celebration of every inch of ground you can hold that is closer to your goals and aspirations.
There must be no standstill or digging in against an imagined foe.
The only way out is through and forward, uplifting yourself every step of the way.