Validation in the Spotlight

Tomorrow is my birthday, and sitting here thinking about it from a professional perspective, I have not called it out at all. I’ve always preferred to keep something personal, like my birthday, limited to my family and friends. Never felt comfortable bringing attention to myself, felt awkward celebrating a milestone that put the focus solely on me. This made me realize tonight how easy it is to let personal attitudes like this get in the way of a very important driver in the work place - validation.

Sure our culture is riddled with competitive people and environments that inhibit positive affirmations for good work. Let the money and the responsibilities that come as award stand in for simple acknowledgements - that was how I thought all of this worked. But after I climbed a few of those assumed mountains, and got the money and/or the responsibility, it felt surprisingly empty.

When I finally dug into why the rewards were not sustaining me through subsequent challenges, I realized I would rather have a steady stream of intentional feedback (both positive and constructive) that made me feel much more connected to my boss, my team, my colleagues. And at the end of the day connections to people matter the most.

So I’m still not going to make a big deal about my birthday at work tomorrow, but at least in reflecting on that I’m clear on the importance of validating the people I work with - for the things that I know matter to them, for doing great work and giving their best effort, and when they are off course and need my support.