TAPPING INTO THE ADULTHOOD

Embarking on your own solo journey is what we call adulting. The twenties and so on are called the years of wisdom.

Where I come to say hello to my very own "wisdom tooth". It is funny but when we come to think of it, there must be some logic behind why we actually call it a wisdom tooth. Anyway, the problem with writing about adulthood is, it is everywhere. Even on your social media feed or during a pep talk with your childhood friend. Every day we learn, and we yearn. It is an entire wholesome journey.

Adulthood is a mere social construct.

When exactly are you an adult?         

The venting of frustration to contemplation, the late-night sittings impacting home life to friendly competitiveness or the deadly hollow comparisons. The politics and the constant grooming have put us under the umbrella of madness. An inevitable craze to fulfill our self-prophecy. Adulthood is different for men and women, while success is hard-wired for both. Opportunities swing in when you create your own pathway. Psst. It is the hidden untold truth.

As much as we have looked forward to adulthood since childhood, the question is why? for liberation? dignity? belonging? or just the curiosity about what adults do. Decision-making and responsibilities come hand-in-hand, but the right choices actually determine where we are really going. Maybe adulting is having a position in a society where your chowkidar knows where exactly you work because of your family and says, 'salaam baji/sahib' every time you walk right in front of him.

In a world full of disguises, and social structures, what are we offered? money? fame? the question is different for everyone, pick yours. For me stepping in adulthood, is to maintain peace within. It is to expand my horizon of imagination, while staying grounded. Often times, it is tricky, to manage anger, right, but the harsh reality is, to calm it down and manage. Or else, it will kick you. Going back to adulting and moods, so there's anger, while maintaining peace, there will be times when you will care more what is going in the outside world rather than inside. There will be times, when you will invite sadness and not realize. How to take this? simply just sit with it. I have so many realizations in my adult period, but when you sit with your emotions only then you are better able to handle it.

Realization:

1. Waking up to a heavy head even when you have run your errands from the night before. (I wake up at 5am. for my fajr)
2. Life is not a bed of roses, daisies or lavenders.
3. Your mind if kept idle, will lose its way to your goal.
4. Friends are tapping with you in adulthood, but you're the 'FIRST' one who is actually stepping in.
5. Digital media, especially social media platforms, are not so social. They help... but slurp out all the moist in your eyes.

to be continued...

[Support from family, friends and colleagues helps build the constructive rally we need around us. I end this piece humbled and heartened with the song The Warmth Of Parents' Hands by Arooj Aftab and Danshin on my playlist.]

Alifia Bashir,

alifiabashir@gmail.com