Modes of Persuasion

Ethos. Pathos. Logos. 

Credibility. Emotion. Logic.

These are the modes of persuasion and whether you are a leader, salesperson or a child trying to get an extra cookie, Aristotle said that to influence people and change behaviors, you need a balance of the emotional and the analytical while remaining credible. 

In my 28 years in business, I have seen many leaders and salespeople with the power to persuade. These influencers know that the best arguments contain all three modes of persuasion. I have also sold with people who never learned this concept and still continue to unsuccessfully sell on the value of the company logo, or just the logic of facts and figures.

When you uncover what it is that means the most to your audience, and give them the path to achieve it, you get an emotional buy-in.

Never underestimate the power of "soft skills."

When my daughter was 11 years old, she wanted an iPhone. At the time, some of her friends were getting smartphones and it was cool because they could text one another and stay connected via social media. We all know that a smartphone is an easy way to talk to the world. But, just because you have the technology and the power to do so, doesn’t mean you have the skills. With the threat of predators and cyberbullying and other opportunities where the risk outweighed the reward, my wife and I agreed that our daughter was too young to have that kind of power.

Being smart and persuasive, our daughter began an 18-month campaign. She would come home from school every few weeks and lay out her test and quiz scores on the kitchen table. Straight A’s to show us how credible and responsible she was...and "didn’t she deserve an iPhone?" We applauded her efforts, but were not moved to change our position. 

As an athlete, she had many opportunities to win races, score goals and win games for her team, and would often come home to ask if her efforts on the field were deserving of the reward of an iPhone. Of course, we cheered her accomplishments, but no amount of goals would change our position or the perception of a device that would cause more harm than good. Performance in the classroom and on the field had nothing to do with getting an iPhone. 

Until one day, a year and a half later, she finally figured out that the way to get what you want is to give your audience what they want. So, she knocked on my office door and patiently waited until I could give her my full attention. She paused for effect, and then said, “Did you know, if a girl is abducted, she is more likely to be found if she has an iPhone because of the built-in GPS?” And, then she waited silently, like any great salesperson would. She waited for my brain to do all the work...and imagine her locked in a trunk, screaming for me to come rescue her. She allowed my emotions to kick in, until finally I told her to go get her coat, because we were going to get her an iPhone. 

She changed the game on me. Here I was thinking that the phone was a way for her to get in trouble, but in a single moment, she changed my beliefs. A communication device suddenly became a safety device. And, the risk of the phone getting her in trouble paled in comparison to benefits of her safety. 

She never told me where she got her information, and I’m not really sure if her startling statement was logically sound, but it didn’t matter. I already made the choice to get her the phone. I even knew I was being manipulated, because the night before her pitch, we just happened to end up watching the Liam Neeson movie, “Taken.” Coincidence? I think not. 

She’ll be a freshman at Northwestern next year, studying political science…of course.