How Not To Write

I copywrite loads of corporate and government documents, sometimes from scratch and sometimes from drafts I receive. Some drafts are quite good, some are awful. If you want to avoid writing an awful draft, here are a few tips.

1. Don’t be long-winded

One of the main changes I find I have to make to drafts is to shorten them. Don’t repeat yourself. Don’t use three words when one will do. Don’t use very long sentences.

 “Our aspiration to improve the way people work is underpinned by our drive to create robust processes that optimise resources and add value in a way that shapes innovation.” Too many ideas scrunched up together. Say: “We aim to help you improve productivity by offering you process short-cuts.”

 2. Don’t use ‘drive’ or ‘deliver’

These are such lazy verbs to use – yet the common default. “This will drive higher growth next year”. Who actually says that? It’s just corporate-ese. How about “This will increase growth next year”?

 3. Don’t blind people with data

Most people find statistics difficult to understand. Even many people in business or government. “In 2015, 20% of the population owned 72.2% of the wealth with the top 50% owning 92.1%.” What does that mean? To convey the meaning, use descriptive terms, or common fractions (like three-quarters), rather than percentages. “In 2015, wealth was unevenly distributed: the top half of the population owned nearly all of it.” If the actual numbers are important to you, add them in a footnote.

 4. Don’t start with platitudes

“As the long winter nights draw in…” “As the long, hot summer continues…” Too many newsletters evoke the season or the weather in the introduction. But it doesn’t grab your readers’ attention. Just get to the point.  

 5. Don’t write like a robot

“We’ve worked extensively throughout the year to implement and accelerate our business strategies.” Think about how this would sound if you were being interviewed on Radio Four. Who has done that? How has it been achieved? Why are you accelerating a strategy, when a strategy should run at its own pace?

 “Our goal is to align and galvanize our employees around our purpose and strategy to drive higher engagement and greater profitability.” Aargh. This is another real example. Just say “We aim to increase profitability by inspiring our employees.” (If that’s what you mean.) 

If you can’t explain it simply, don’t say it. If you can’t explain it, simply don’t say it.