Grieving for your old-normal?

"I think I literally cry everyday, as I battle my way through all this! During my daily exercises I just break down. I miss everything that made me independent. Driving, typing, walking my dog, cooking, grooming myself. Hair, make up, heels. Yea some of that stuff is superficial, but I miss it. I was good at a lot of things. Maybe not perfect but I was really good. Just thought I'd post this for some support. I don't mean to depress anyone with my words."

Kiara stroke survivor 18/8/16

"I often cry for my old life.

I hate the fact I can't go on a 1 hr dog walk without the need to embarrassingly empty my bladder without a moments' notice.

I hate the fact that I can't get dressed without sitting down or that I laugh when I really shouldn't or speak differently or lost all my friends bar 4.

I hate the fact that my relationship is different and that my kids and husband are scared suffer severe anxiety, especially separation anxiety, because of my stroke.

Yeah life now often seems totally shit.

But it isn't all bad.

The new-me isn't a lot nicer than before, even though I am very emotionally fragile now.

Also,there are opportunities now, that I would never have comprehended  before.

The closeness of our family,

The positive impact I can have on peoples' crumbling lives,

My increased 'emotional intelligence' (Thanks #SharonStone!),

My no-longer-feel-the-need-to-try-to-be-a-people-pleaser,

The stories of inspiration I hear daily,

My speaking career,

The expertise and influence in the stroke world, all make me happier than I ever thought could have been possible.

I accept it's just about finding your new-normal and not reflecting on what you have lost.

Life sucks for many people but it's about deciding if you are gonna look back or embrace your future?

Honestly, I generally a half-full kind of person, but I can do self-pity occasionally.

I have really crap, low days now but I just accept them and resign myself to watching crap TV all day whilst I hide and cry.

But I always, always try to wake up the next day with a fresh perspective and positive outlook on my new-normal."

Kate 18/8/16

@KateAllatt

Stroke survivor

@FightingStrokes founder/CEO 

Internationally published author – Running Free