FEEDBACK!..

Feedback!..

Whichever organization or team you're working in and/or with, feedback is often touted by the powers that be as this all powerful thing, that once mastered, will help solve everything. It's kind of strange really...

However, no-one really helps us in understanding how to give, or receive feedback effectively.

From my experience, I believe there a couple of key things to keep in mind in order to allow feedback to be truly impactful, on either side of the equation. For this article, let's first focus on the receiving side, and how we can best prep our frame of mind and thinking to receive feedback well.

1st - we need to understand that we, as humans, naturally don't like hearing 'unpleasant truths' about ourselves or anything we may perceive as negative. Instead, we like being told we're great as stuff, and that we're generally awesome. Obviously this isn't conducive to receiving feedback effectively, so 1st step is to be aware of this, and try to shift our mindset to more of an open, growth mindset - where we are open to hearing different perspectives and opinions about how we are doing and our impact. Again, I do understand this is easier said than done for some of us..

2nd - in most instances, feedback is given to us from others who are trying to help us grow. Again, we usually get on the defensive when we hear the line .."hey do you have a few mins...?" after a meeting or review. We usually think to ourselves, oh gosh, what could this be? What now?..

Remember, usually the person(s) are taking their time to give us the feedback or observation of some sort. While there is a common quote that feedback is a gift, remember that it's also a risk. When a colleague or friend speaks up to offer you their feedback, either constructive or positive, they’re taking a risk with your response and how you'll respond.. They’re risking potential harm to your existing relationship. Or they’re risking wasting their time by giving feedback to someone who won’t receive it. Therefore, once you take this into account, you'll approach these moments with more gratitude and openness, as you'll know that it a) usually comes from a place of empathy, and b) the other person is also 'risking' a lot to take the energy and time to give you the feedback in the first place.

3rd - now we've got ourselves in a more open and receptable mindset, it's time to take action. Just getting ourselves in a right mindset to listen to feedback doesn't bring about personal growth along. It's also about us clarifying, synthesizing the feedback that's given to us, and then taking action and implementing it. Some things we can do pretty simply and straightforwardly are to restate back what you're hearing in your own way. Don't repeat back verbatim, but a simple "so what from what I understand, what you're saying is..." can do wonders to the other party feeling like you're listening, as well as clarifying your own understanding. After this, make (mental or physical) notes on what's been discussed and how you're going to go about actioning the feedback. Depending on your relationship with 'said' person, arrange a future/regular date to check-in to see if they've observed any positive change(s). This can be done in a variety of ways; email, IM, in-person, video-calls etc. We live in a world now where we have such great optionality, so use this to your advantage!

Hope you find this brief summary of how we can best receive feedback helpful in some way. Remember, feedback goes both ways, and is also an ongoing process. Just like anything in our lives, it starts off a bit tricky and unnatural, but over time we can 'train' ourselves in a way that makes it easier. Be patient, give it time, and get into the habit, and I'm of no doubt you'll find adopting a feedback oriented and growth mindset will prove invaluable in your own, as well as your teams growth journeys...