Dancing Conversations!

Why did it even occur?

So, I had it in my mind for a long time to understand how coaching works and be able to experience it and after considerable push to myself I finally enrolled myself for the coach training program in October 2019.

The reason why I had been wanting to do this was that I strongly wanted to develop my skills to be able to do my role as a Business Partner even better, to be able to spar the leaders in their journeys, facilitating their process of decisions, challenges and change. Somewhere I have been passionate about and driven by seeing people grow, being able to contribute in that growth and that made me explore coaching. With that thought in mind, curiosity to learn something new, uncertainty about what it's going to be I attended my first training session to enter the world of coaching.

Sneak Peak

So, the first day was like a sneak peak inside the coaching world. I think what I realized the first day itself was that this is going to be a lot of unlearning before I begin to learn anything new. The whole idea of coach being an equal partner and not someone who comes as an expert to find solutions for the client was critical to emphasize and reemphasize to myself. I mean theoretically this may sound like obvious or known but to practice this needs a lot of practice😊

The unlearning continues

As I moved further in the journey to understand the concept and the competencies, every word and the model started to make so much more meaning and how it applies to people and situations. Honestly, I did feel a bit overwhelmed initially and thought that I may not even remember these models and authors but later I think I realized that it's not about remembering the model, the tool, the author but the message that you get, the process of experiencing it and that's just what you need. I felt that more you internalize these for yourself the more you understand them and then, you don't need to remember it.

Talking about internalizing, I think that's actually a moment of truth. And now that I think about it, I feel there is no other way to believe in the process till the time you feel and experience the transformation yourself. This may not happen soon but whenever it does your lens of looking at coaching changes. For me it came in a moment I was reading a book where a statement left me deeply impacted, it said" Reaction is enslavement to the situation whereas taking responsibility is freedom" (Inner Engineering-Sadhguru) it doesn't mean that it gives you joy/victory in every situation but you at least take control of your self than being enslaved to the situation. When you react, you draw a boundary for yourself but when you choose to take responsibility of how you will respond to that situation, you are in control and you make a choice.

The first ever coaching session! Beauty and the Beast

My first practice coaching session turned out be with someone who was almost a coach (and much more) herself. The good part was that I met her in that very moment, so I had no knowledge about her background to build any opinion or judgement, and that I realized was the biggest plus in that conversation. Since I did not know I was curious, since I did not know I was fully present, since I did not know my mind was not having conversations about her background, right, wrong etc. etc. And that I would say is the beauty and the beast. Beauty for what we created in that conversation and the realization that our judgements and internal conversations can be a big beast to conquer if we were to create that beautiful experience. As they say to be in a state of mindlessness is an art!

(the session wasn't the best for the client possibly but for me it left great learnings😊)

and I went along

The more I practiced the more I learnt, I also learnt that being an internal coach may not be easy as it will take much more to bring the mindlessness and create the moment. And especially as you start there will be natural learning curve where you often find yourself ending in a counselling or mentoring conversation. BUT every conversation gives you a lot to learn, not only about the client but also yourself, your inner game, your mind blocks which hopefully if you rise in the learning curve you can overcome. The next few were some very insightful cases helping me understand the application of concepts and models that I learnt and the fact that human beings have so much potential, only if we could see it all…

Dancing Conversations

I have always been very fond of dancing but could never relate the word with conversations. It was during our training and practice sessions when someone very beautifully said, when you manage to be really "present" there comes a moment that from being in a state of mindlessness you move to dive inside the mind of your client and then your questions and responses just flow as a dance, as a symphony. Being Present is as simple and as difficult depending on how willing you are.

These coaching conversations may sound fluffy soft option to some, but Coaching indeed is not that, its an art and a science (I am inclined more towards the art), its deeply personal and at the same time objective and empowering. Empowering the client to take ownership and transform themselves and empowering for the coach for being able to support that. Isn't that beautiful!

I am still in the nascent steps and have a long journey ahead but feel glad that I took this direction😊